The Winter Finally Came (1/14/24)

The winter finally came.
Frigid tempuratures, 3 inches of snow, and a 2 inch sheet of ice underneath. And yet the sun shines so bright today. It washes over me as I sit in my sun room.

I went for a hobble this morning, stuffed with four layers. A thick coat that doesn't zip, a thinner coat that does, snow pants, red checkered pajama pants and t-shirt, big winter boots, thermal shirt, thermal pants, thermal socks, and a scarf around my neck. I hobbled my way to the end of the block before the wind numbed my face. I fell back and made my place in the snow where the grass used to be, and I took in the sun. Usually I can hear the rush of cars from the busy streets, but today it was silent. I've missed silence.

Often times when I find a quiet place, the silence is intruded. Trampled in stampede-like fashion. Punished by an inquisition of delusioned spirits, or a screen of horrible memories. Recently, and only with a great deal of work, I've found true silence. I watch my breath turn white as I hear my voice echo in the distance. Through the winters smoke screen, I see a beam of light. I catch a glimpse of a hill which calls back to me. I'm finding my way there.

<3<3<3

starting to love myself. Feeling sludge. I need food and water. <3<3<3